Is it legal to kick your 22 year old child out of the house?

Question

My 22 year old daughters lives with my husband and I, or she did anyway before we decided to kick her out. She graduated from college last spring and was able to find a full time pretty much right away. She decided to move back home, but my husband and I told her that she can live here as long as she pays 300 dollars a month and helps around the house. She reluctantly agreed. Some people are criticizing us for charging our own daughter with rent. However, my husband and I feel that if your grown child has a full time job and is not in school he or she should be able to pay rent. Anyway, I know I've rambled so I'm going to get to my issue. My daughter has not payed us for any rent for three straight months and has pretty much not contributed to the household, so We decided that it was best for her to move out. We made her pack her clothes and leave at once. Did we go too far? Was it legal of us to kick her out?

Answer 1

Years ago when I got my first job my parents charged me $65 a month but they received my whole paycheck and doled out to me busfare and lunch money. They also charged my sister rent. We were expected only to keep our own room and the bathroom neat and clean. My parents reminded us that they would always love us and told us we could come back home any time we wanted to or needed to, that the door was always open.

Today rentals ,one room with shared bath in someone's home is anywhere from $300-$450 where I live.

The economy has been poor for the past 7 years with trying to find a job taking from 3 months to 3 years or more so young people are returning home and some returning up to their mid 30's. So maybe you needed a good talk with her before she left giving irresponsibility as the reason she was tossed out. Sure it's legal to kick her out, but without an explanation or trying to solve the problem by several other ways, well you might have alienated her, and maybe even lost any future grandchildren. Maybe once she rents an apartment, signs the lease then IF she doesn't pay her rent and gets evicted or loses her job and gets evicted because she can't pay, then hopefully she will stop back to say hello and say how lucky she was that you were asking just $300.

Answer 2

It is legal. But I don't think it is moral. Before you do that you should make sure that she has a place to stay or else you may as well be kicking her out into a gutter. Many crazy people on the streets, many people take advantage of a young beautiful girl. If I was married and had a daughter I wouldn't just kick her out, because I know that if anything bad would happen to her, I may never see her again.



But reading the rent part. If she doesn't have a job then she cannot pay rent. But if she is your daughter you wouldn't treat her like a business associate or a stranger and kick her out when she couldn't pay rent. You should have talked to her and find out why she didn't or couldn't pay rent of $300 per month. And sorted out an action plan of some sort. Maybe help her getting a job, because I would think it is hard for a young person to get a job. Me myself being a young person understands how hard it is to get a job, and I have seen some university graduates searching for work.



Being too tough on your kids will make them hate you or fear you. When you're older you will need them.





No parent who loves there child or daughter would just chuck them out of their household because they don't pay rent. And not if their child would be homeless on the street. how could a parent sleep knowing that their child/ daughter could be homeless in the cold at night?

Answer 3

It would be nice if you helped her find another place with friends that was in a good environment.

Maybe you don't care but sometimes they just move in with some scumbag boyfriend.

Then they can't afford to leave them. I mean he could be dealing drugs. She may never be sober again. These are the hard lessons we are sometimes taught or have to endure.

There are options like she could live with an older lady and help with running errands and clean up.

My folks let me stay forever and I think it made me a little too comfortable . Really so there are no answers from me. If you live in a nice home and require very little income to be comfortable.. you can become pretty immature and under motivated.

You begin to enjoy life without the drama of a young person who has emotional ups and downs .

It 's a tough call. I would let my kid back in but I just give her money while she is living away.

You know like an oil change or groceries or a manicure. I figure I don't need all this money and I enjoy giving it to her. It depends on your financial situation as well.

No judgments . You are probably a great mom. You are within rights and she should have paid you without you having to ask.

Answer 4

Law is different than Ethics. It is legal but at the same time not moral, not to mention some would even call it inhuman. Before making haste decisions, it's always wise to have a talk, discuss everything and have both sides express their points and make their statements. I completely understand your point as a mother and if I were in your shoes, I would feel the same.



Honestly, it is a matter that has to do with law and ethics, so, it's really up to you to decide which one it weighs down to for you. Both are equally important and deserve the same consideration and should be valued but what is more important for you? What are you more concerned about? I think it's about the ethics part and I don't blame you.



Contact her and if you manage to have a talk, explain to her your point and if all goes well, everything will fall into place and your daughter will understand you better and you also will feel more at ease, as if that heavy load has been taken off of you. A good talk will make up for all the misunderstandings that may have been caused and your relationship will improve.

Answer 5

Yes, it's legal and personally I don't think you should feel bad about it at all. If we don't teach our children responsibility, they'll never be able to make it in the real world. If she were on her own, she would be paying a lot more than $300 a month, and I'm assuming that's utilities included. By what you wrote, you even waited not only until she was 22, but also until she had full-time employment. My parents began charging my brother and I rent shortly after we turned 18. Not to mention the fact that no one knows your personal or financial situation. Maybe you depended on that money to pay your mortgage and keep that roof over everyone's head? If that was the case, she would have been "evicted" either way. Along with the rest of the family. Some consider things like this tough love. But in today's world, it's all but necessary unfortunately.

Answer 6

It is legal to kick 18 year old and above out of the house

Answer 7

Well it's not legal in the sense that you cannot put her clothes on the street and lock her out. But that is not what it sounds like you are doing. $300 per month is more than reasonable. I think she needs a dose of reality. Give her 90 days to find her own place. Guaranteed she'll be back for laundry, meals, and anything else she can get from your house, but you must cut her off completely. In six months she'll be crying about how hard life is and begging you to let her move back in .

Answer 8

Yes, it was legal. She didn't sign a binding contract (and if she had, you would still have been within your rights). You also said she found full-time work quickly, so paying your low rent should not have been much of a hardship.



Your daughter may have to learn the hard way that at some point, everyone has to grow up and pay their own way. Unless she was in dire financial straits or having major health difficulties, etc., there's not even an ethical or moral reason you should continue to bail her out, let alone a legal one. At 22, she needs to learn to be an adult.

Answer 9

It's completely legal, and not out of the ordinary these days. If your daughter received a college education, has no trouble paying her loans AND has managed to find full-time employment, she is doing miles better than most of the recent graduates out there. I know many people who are graduates that live at home and have to pay rent. Your child is no longer a child, and you're no longer obligated to take care of her financially. She is independent of you. If she didn't pay her rent in an apartment she had a lease for, she would be evicted. That is no different than what you have done. I'm 23 and currently living at home. I don't pay rent because I am in graduate school, but when I graduate, it's been made perfectly clear that I am to pay rent if I stay there. I don't find it unreasonable at all. If she doesn't like the price tag, she can attempt to find something cheaper elsewhere.

Answer 10

I am 23, graduated, making more money than my parents and here my mom is asking me to please stay until I'm married because she loves being close to her family. I want to leave and I feel SO guilty for planning too. Different cultures I guess.

The U.S is a very individualistic society which has its major advantages and disadvantages. There is no right or wrong and its definitely legal to kick her out but don't act all surprised when they dump you in a nursing home and visit you once a year, that is also legal.

Answer 11

It is legal, Even though I am sure it was hard you did the right thing. She needs to learn in the real world you get evicted if you don't pay on time, or you can lose your house or anything you make payments on.



I charged my son rent when he graduated and started living at home again. I put the money in savings and when he got his first place, I gave him the money so he could buy needed things for his place.



He was thankful.



Right now she won't probably like you, but someday she will understand how valuable this lesson was.

Answer 12

It is legal, but you sound like a scum bag of a parent. I sure hope one day you won't need some money from her in the future. There's really no right or wrong way of doing it. I'm 22 and still live at home. Then again, I am going to school right now.

Answer 13

I would say it is legal. She's above 18+ and where I'm from that is a legal adult. But to ensure she's safe you should make sure she has a place to stay and has food on the table, and if she's going to live at your house you should have her do chores daily instead of having her pay.

However, you shouldn't've kicked her out because she couldn't afford to pay rent. Sometimes it takes people a while to mature and stop acting childish, I'd let her stay and just let her bloom. She's your daughter, it's not like your letting someone else stay out yourself other than a relative.

Answer 14

Yes, you can she's an legal adult and you have a legit reason to and this is coming from a 20 year old. She has a fulltime job, and she isn't paying rent or buying anything for the house. However just throwing her out without a warning seems a bit wrong. You should've gave her 2 weeks to get her crap together first. If she didn't, then you should've tossed her out.

Answer 15

22 is a very young and vulnerable age. College graduates, yes, seem intelligent but are still trying to figure life out and during that period, they can be victims to a lot of people, economically to emotionally.



I understand you feel the need to take the 300 dollars for your child but I wonder what really motivated you to ask her to pay rent and ask her to eventually leave. You have options of letting her put it in a savings account or you place it in a savings account for her that she could touch later in life or you could have asked for something very different all together.



She went to school with dreams and goals, she was unable to meet them to her standard, she returns home to find her parents acting distant and more business orientated. It seems like she was more interested in some form of emotional support or the very least a therapist about this new chapter in this young persons life.



You can do whatever you want but understand that actions have consequences and she is still significantly younger and still needs guidance. You communicated very clearly that you are unwilling to provide that to her.



I would never think to do this to my children. It would never cross my mind to physically or emotionally abandon my children, especially over some rent money and a few dishes in the sink.



Be honest, you didn't want her in the home for personal reasons you will not admit to anyone or even yourself. Take a look inside and reflect on your actions. She is still incredibly young and learning.

Answer 16

A child is a child. And I guess your 22 year old is a pretty good child -> graduated, got a job -> A+++.

If you are not having issues by paying the bills then in my opinion you should not charge her the rent, but maybe insist she makes a saving account and put $300 there every month. I think you did a wrong thing. You have a great child and you kicked her out because of rent??? Oh my god...

Answer 17

It shouldn't be illegal. If it is illegal try to be in defense saying it was a parent-child matter. She has a full time pay right? She should be earning at least 18,000 dollars. I earn Pell grant and I pay for a car 200 bucks per month and I go to school. I am only given 4,500 each year but after 4 year I will not be able to warn that money. With that said 18,000 is a big difference. She can live independent or rent a room with roomate. If it's illegal I am sure you can defend your case.

Answer 18

Yes, it's legal to kick her out. But since she was supposed to be paying rent, she was your tenant. Legally, if she refuses to leave you would have to go through the eviction process for your state.



How did you change from 3 months without rent to suddenly kick her out "at once"?? It seems that you could have given her until the 1st to pay some rent or something.

Answer 19

She isn't legally obligated to go anywhere. There was a case like this in the past where a couple rented out a room in their home to a grown woman who was a nightmare to live with and they couldn't get rid of her. The judge ruled she didn't have to go anywhere and there was nothing they could do.

Answer 20

Not only legal, but a very good thing to do. Very moral. They should be out on their own so that they can become successful. When you are 90 or 100 you can move in with them, help take care of the grandchildren or great-grandchildren, and try not to be too much of a difficulty.

Answer 21

If you wrestle with such concerns, remember this: Independence is not a door that your child simply walks through; it is a road that he or she travels, and it takes years to complete the journey. For now, you know from observation that “foolishness is tied up with the heart of a boy”—or a girl.—Proverbs 22:15.



With proper guidance, however, your child will likely emerge from adolescence as a responsible young adult with his or her “perceptive powers trained to distinguish both right and wrong.”—Hebrews 5:14.



Keys to Success

A father giving his teenage son the car keys

If your teenager has demonstrated responsible behavior, can you entrust him or her with more freedom?

To prepare your adolescent for adulthood, you need to help him develop his “power of reason” so that he will be able to make sound decisions on his own. * (Romans 12:1, 2)

Answer 22

You are under no legal obligation to house your children once they are adults and 22 is an adult.

You can tell them to get out at any time and you don't need to give any notice or reason.

Answer 23

It's legal to send your child out of your house for any reason after they turn 18.

Answer 24

Yes What happened to the days back when I was in school the 60s. When if us kids made a dime we put a penney in Moms cookie jar. We did not have to be ask we knew it was house rule the cookie jar got 10%. Once out on our own and a full time job we left home.

Answer 25

It's hard to kick your own flesh and blood out of the nest, but your daughter is an adult, a college graduate, and is gainfully employed. It's perfectly legal to kick her out.

Answer 26

Yes. She is of age.



My parents kicked me out a long time ago. Was homeless for a few years and didn't really get anywhere in life. I have not talked to them in 15 years

Answer 27

There is no law that would prevent doing what you did. Whether it was the right thing or not depends on how one looks at it. At one extreme, it is an example of "tough love." At the other, it was cruel, heartless, etc. I lean toward the former because I don't see an alternative. You had an agreement which she did not honor. It is difficult for you to keep your word, as it is for her, but reneging would only work to the detriment of all.

Answer 28

Legal? Yeah.



It's the risk they take staying there past 18.



Depending on circumstances, it can be fair or unfair, though.



Parents are sometimes the only committee a person has on their side.



The case you described seems kinda fair, though. If she is a college grad she has credentials.

Answer 29

Many years ago I lived at home and paid $300 a month rent..my dad was retired and living on that income. I see nothing wrong with that and you might want to serve her a notice. That way you don't have to get rough with her,,in calif the sheriffs come and evict you.

Answer 30

yes, it is legal to kick out over 18s who don't pay rent. But 300 bucks is not much is it?



you should consider your daughter as your child though. You won't let her inherit anything?

Answer 31

It's legal. It's reasonable to have her pay rent.



It's not reasonable to not have warned her after the first month of non-payment that she would be evicted if it continued, so that was a little abrupt.

Answer 32

Of course it's legal. Give her a notice to vacate, at least 30 days. Making her leave immediately was not legal.

Answer 33

It doesn't matter if she is your daughter. By law, she has to pay the rent even though her own parents are the owners. Of course you did right in making her move out. She doesn't pay, you throw her butt out. You should even make a judicial order so that they can have the Sherriff go and remove all her belongings and put them outside, if she refuses to move. She has to contribute no matter what. She also must abide by your rules.

Answer 34

You should speak with a property lawyer about this, since it varies per location. I suggest you do it right away because your daughter may be speaking with or may have spoken with a lawyer already about her rights as a tenant.



Not to alarm you too much, but don't be surprised if your own beloved daughter ambushes you with a lawyer and a suit! You'll want to be as prepared as possible.

Answer 35

First, totally legal. You may have illegally "evicted" her, but what you did was fine as far as your child is concerned.



On the other side, do you think she may have had trouble saving up enough for a deposit on an apartment? Perhaps she was hoping to save up a down payment and buy a place to live...did you even ask?



Personally, I wouldn't have kicked her out, but I also wouldn't have charged rent. I would have escrowed the "rent" and given it back or simply allowed access once she found a place to live. To actually make your child pay rent is, in my opinion, counterproductive...but that's just my opinion. Do you really think she wanted to live with you anymore??

Answer 36

Yes, it's legal. She is an adult and you do not have to support her any longer.



However, there is a proper way to go about it. The first step is to issue her a written notice to vacate (google your state's landlord/tenant laws to find out how much notice is required). If she is still there at the end of the notice period and refuses to leave, you will have to evict her through the courts.

Answer 37

of course. she is 22, not 12. your idea of charging her rent was a very good one. you have to pay somebody might as well pay your parents. she has failed to follow up on what she promised to do. you kicking her out was absolutely the right thing to do. and yes, it was legal.

Answer 38

I would live at your house for $300/month, that's cheap - for rent that is, not family! idk, a lot of people here are giving you the go ahead so I think you should hear some alternative advice as well: she's your daughter! What's wrong with you? It could be the right move if it motivates her, but it could demoralize her just as easily. I think the real problem is not wether this is the right move, it's wether YOU can live with the decision.

Answer 39

It is NOT LEGAL to kick your child out.



Now that I have your attention, it depends on your local laws. Here in Baltimore if the home is the persons legal address you have to file an eviction and give six weeks notice on top of filing the eviction which itself takes time. It doesn't matter if rent is an issue, if the address is on their license it is their legal address and you cannot put them out. You need to look into your local laws and not trust random arm charm attorneys on the Internet.

Answer 40

She us working and should now contribute to the household.

She will find living elsewhere a lot more expensive.

As soon as I was working and living at home I had to contribute to the household.

It sounds as she has not learned that life is not free.

Making her leave immediately was a bit harsh. At the first none payment she should have been put on notice.

With no credit history she will find it hard to rent her own place and a lot more expensive.

Answer 41

It was legal. I agree that she should pay rent and help around the house. Guess I would have given her a final 30 day warning and also have helped her to find a new place.

Answer 42

You have to give her 30 days written notice in order for an eviction to be legal.

Answer 43

yes it is. The house is not in her name. You and your hubby are right in charging rent for her staying there for food, the electric and yes internet service.

Your daughter is legally an adult. Be sure to change the locks on the doors, and I mean all of them!

Answer 44

I have 3 adult children. When they were finished with school, and got jobs they liked, they had to pay so much every month into a saving deposit in my name. When they moved out and bought their own places, we gave them the money they saved. I would never kick any child out ever, too many things can happen to them.

Answer 45

You have no legal obligation after the age of 18 in the U.S.

Answer 46

im was 18 when i had enough of the family drama i was 19 when i got my first apartment now im 21 paying bills just like everyone else i don't agree to the whole stay with your family thing u made the right choice

Answer 47

it is perfectly legal. there must be some breakdown in your relationship or communication because she is ignoring your wishes. it would be better to give her notice that she will have to move within 2 weeks, let her make some plans.

I don't think you should expect her to look after you when you are older, because you see she is already ignoring you now.

Answer 48

Yes

Answer 49

Kids should be sent to boarding school at 6 years old, they can return home at 18 or 21, ready for work and paying their way.

Answer 50

Perfectly legal to throw her out - she was getting off cheap. When I lived with my mother I paid $800 a month, bought my own food, did my own laundry and followed her rules.

Answer 51

there is nothing that says you can't kick her out. you could have given her a week or two to either pay rent or find a place to go. where did she go when you kicked her out?

Answer 52

I think this actually falls under some sort of property rental law but things can become quite mixed up when there is no written rental agreement. In some places it might not actually be legal.

Answer 53

Don't feel bad. Your daughter knows the remedy - pay rent. She agreed once so why does she default now. Perhaps she wanted to move out but wanted also to place the responsibility for her decision elsewhere.

Answer 54

Of course. Why on earth wouldn't it be? She's a legal adult. You no longer owe her anything at all.

Answer 55

Perfectly legal, you are not responsible for her once she is 18,it would be nicer to give her a months notice, but you do not have to.

Answer 56

Of course it's legal, if she wasn't even able to do that then she must be really immature. At the same time, I wouldn't expect her to be able to survive if she couldn't even handle your agreement.

Answer 57

I think there's nothing wrong with what you did and she'll probably be fine. You should keep an eye out for her, though, and be ready to help in case she really needs it.

Answer 58

Nope its nots illegal as she is an adult, shes not really a child anymore. Also you didn't do anything wrong, its good to teach her responsibility shes a grown up now.

Answer 59

It s legal. The peeps saying that it was illegal probably don t realize that she didn t sign a contract. If you weren t legally her landlord then you have nothing to worry about.

Answer 60

Heavens no. According to local laws you must support her until the day you die. In fact you are required to give back all the money she paid you, plus buy her a new Corvette to get to her job. Actually she can quit her job and live off you forever, or until you die.

Answer 61

legal yes moral to give no time never. You should have given her an out date not just packed her bags and thrown her out.

Answer 62

Perfectly legal and totally justified

And many are wrong, children are not covered by the laws that cover tenants, they can be told to leave immediatly

Answer 63

Xompiy

Answer 64

It's legal, but you can not treat your daughter like this, you should help her, make her realize she need work to support herself.

Answer 65

Its legal. Don't think i would ever do that my kid, but yeah you'll be fine. As long as you can sleep at night. 😉

Answer 66

Give her a 15-30 day eviction notice~!

Answer 67

Basically you daughter is a tenant who has failed to pay rent. Get her to sign a month to month lease and to pay rent. When she fails to do that, you must follow the laws of your state in order to convict her.

Answer 68

You realize you're seeing the results of her parenting, right?



Legally you can go through the eviction process which requires a court order.



You can't just point at the door and say, "Get Out!"

Answer 69

Damn right, they are an adult, its time they started paying rent or get out. It's time they faced the real wold and it is not pleasant.

Answer 70

Yup

Answer 71

Unfortunately it is illegal. She would have to be properly evicted with notice and she could go to court. If she was to call the police they cant make her leave

Answer 72

You need to follow legal eviction rules but, sure, evict the ingrate.

Answer 73

all children should pay for 'board + lodgings' when they start earning a wage. i'm sure most of us did in our younger days. my parents used to 'tip up', when they were younger, which meant they gave all their wage to their mother, and she gave them 'spending money' back. nowadays its fair to give a proportion of your wage to keep you fed and housed.

Answer 74

Yes. And you're also within your rights to find ways to make her pay you back.

Answer 75

yes

Answer 76

Shows how much you love your rebellious daughter.

Answer 77

Yes. You went to far.

Answer 78

yes

Answer 79

$300 includes food and utilities? She is dumb not to realize it is a deal.

Answer 80

A bit harsh, hope she is okay and safe.

Answer 81

Yep.

Answer 82

yes, it is legal

Answer 83

It depends. Is she a racist con or a good liberal?

Answer 84

She is an adult. As such you are not responsible for her welfare.

Answer 85

yeah

Answer 86

KICK HER OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 87

yeah.

Answer 88

HECK NO!