Ned: The Most Popular Man in the World (from Comedy Central)?

Question

Bill and Ned walk into a fast food joint one afternoon to get lunch. Bill orders and the cashier gives him his meal. Ned goes up to order and the cashier greets him with "Hello Ned! How are you? Hey everybody! Ned's here!" Everybody in the restaurant comes up and says hello to Ned. After everyone has greeted him, Bill and Ned sit down and begin to eat.
"Ned, you're pretty popular!" says Bill. "I'm the most popular man in the world," says Ned.

"Now Ned," says Bill, your pretty popular but you're not the most popular man in the world."

"Oh yeah," Ned replies "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I'm friends with anybody you can name!"

"That so?" answers Bill, "How about the President of the United States?"

"Let's go!" says Ned.

The two fly to Washington and knock on the front door of the White House. The president answers, "Ned! How are you doing? I haven't seen you in ages!" The three go play a round of golf and then leave.

Answer 1

WOW ! That is a really old joke - but, when I first heard it somewhere around 1965, it was Maxy the Jew (get it? a jew who knows the pope??)



Anyway - what does FOTBS mean? I can't find it anywhere, unless you mean 'Friends of the Bird Santuary'.



How's this one -



One day this guy goes to a baseball game. It was a playoff game and the place was sold out. As he tried to get to his seat, he hears up in the crowd somewhere, "HEY, STANLEY ! HEY, UP HERE !"

He looks up above him in the bleachers, but it is so crowded, he can't tell who was calling him. So, he just goes and sits down. A little while later, during the 2nd inning, he hears again, "HEY, STANLEY ! STANLEY ! HEY, UP HERE !".

He looks around behind him, but again, it is so crowed he can't tell where it's coming from.

A few innings later, he stands up to get a hot dog and a beer, and as soon as he does, he hears, "YO STANLEY !, STANLEY ! - TURN AROUND - I'M UP HERE !"

This time he turn around and looks up at the crowd and yells back, "LISTEN - MY NAME IS NOT STANLEY - IT'S BRUNO."

Answer 2

hehe advantageous one yet on an identical time as the best guy interior the international replaced into leaping out he truthfully in mid air converted the backpack with the pencils and string right into a hanglider which accurately introduced him back to the floor on an identical time as the president and woman jumped out aliens had come of their spaceships and attacked the international. This awakened the Ninja grasp who used his ninja skills to smash each and all of the aliens, yet hwile doing so their spaceships exploded sending 1000's of pounds of candy that overwhelmed each and all of the human beings different than bunnies who began ingesting the candy and became very hyper and had attractive time which created large great bunnies who had the best bunny interior the international that recreated the human poplulation and day after right this moment the bunnies had created their own planet and all of back to regular

Answer 3

huh??