JOKE: Swearing At Work. A Letter from the Boss?

Question

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their colleagues.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realise the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with colleagues.

Therefore, a list of 13 New and Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases have been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.


1.


Try Saying:


I think you could do with more training


Instead Of:


You don't have a f***ing clue, do you?

2.


Try Saying:


She's an aggressive go-getter.


Instead Of:


She's a f***ing power-crazy b*tch

3.


Try Saying:


Perhaps I can work late


Instead Of:


And when the f*** do you expect me to do this?

4.


Try Saying:


I'm certain that isn't feasible


Instead Of:


F*** off a*se-wipe

5.


Try Saying:


Really?


Instead Of:


Well f*** me backwards with a telegraph pole

6.


Try Saying:


Perhaps you should check with...


Instead Of:


Tell someone who gives a f***.

7.


Try Saying:


I wasn't involved in the project.


Instead Of:


Not my f***ing problem, mate.

8.


Try Saying:


That's interesting.


Instead Of:


What the f***?

9.


Try Saying:


I'm not sure this can be implemented within the given timescale.


Instead Of:


No f***ing chance mate.

10.


Try Saying:


It will be tight, but I'll try to schedule it in


Instead Of:


Why the f*** didn't you tell me that yesterday?

11.


Try Saying:


He's not familiar with the issues


Instead Of:


He's got his head up his f***ing a*se.

12.


Try Saying:


Excuse me, sir?


Instead Of:


Oi, f*** face.

13.


Try Saying:


Of course, I was only going to be at home anyway


Instead Of:


Yeah, who needs f***ing holidays anyway.

Thanks

xx Sarah

Answer 1

THAT is Perfect. (And just one day after my most recent Violation Notice...:)

Answer 2

................... are we working at the same Office???



Your Boss sounds like mine!

Answer 3

Brilliant,love them.I'll pass them on to my boss

Answer 4

omg...do you know me well or what ?



yes i've been in f*cking trouble at work many times just for swearing and saying everything you just said :)



yes everybody at my work got a letter from the boss saying to...talk like this and not like that....p.s...i work for the u.s.government and they record our conversations and also there is video cameras everywhere too.

Answer 5

Haha, perfect! I'll be posting these at work

Answer 6

Swearing At Work Funny

Answer 7

Yes, your boss is abusive. Probably the job is too stressful for her. I would suggest that you and the other staff try to get together with her socially to try to iron out your differences, and try to explain that you all want to work together as a team. Failing that, you could use the company grievance procedure, and take the matter up with her boss. If none of that works, I am afraid your only option is to find another job.

Answer 8

I'm going to print these out.

Answer 9

i am rolling on the floor laughing

Answer 10

what do you do with two jocks who do it all the time without a break...give them a woman who swears at them point blank,it shut these two up for 30 seconds.

Answer 11

haha, awesome, and I hate to admit, I'm in offense of some of those

Answer 12

i tried to read

but ur sweet and beau pic is not allowing me to,