Question:
I love puns! Give me a pun i'll give you 10 points?
FireKittenofdoom
2006-05-07 21:41:58 UTC
The pun that makes me laugh the most i will give 10 points too!
21 answers:
somepeopleRstupid
2006-05-07 21:51:43 UTC
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.





If a priest is called a white collar worker, then a nun would be a creature of habit.





The riot at Macy's was called a shopping maul.





Using deodorant is no sweat.





I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.





Police were called to a daycare where a two-year-old was resisting a rest.





Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.





He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.





What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing - but it let out a little whine.
BUTTERFLY
2006-05-08 05:58:34 UTC
1.A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.

2.When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

3.There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.

4.A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said 'No change yet'.

5.The two guys caught drinking battery acid will soon be charged.

6.The couple who met in a revolving door are still going round together.

7.Some people's noses and feet are build backwards: their feet smell and their noses run.

8.When women enter middle age, it gives men a pause.

9.He avoided funerals because he was not a mourning person.

10.He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

11.When asked by a passenger how high he would get, the pilot replied,'I don't do drugs.'

12.There was a guy who was fired from the orange juice factory for lack of concentration.

13.If you step onto a plane and recognize a friend of yours named Jack don't yell out Hi Jack!

14.He wears glasses during math because it improves divison.

15.It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

16.You didn't hear about the three big holes in the ground? Well, well, well.

17.A guy became so good with a chainsaw that he was promoted to branch manager.

18.If you miss a class at beauty school you'll need a makeup session.

19.England doesn't have a kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

20.A small boy went to the counter to pay for his lunch but he was a little short.

21.When crazy glue was invented lots of people became attached to it.

22.Prison walls are never built to scale.

23.While training to work at Coca Cola he was given a pop quiz.

24.If you say you have bad skin, I'd say that was a pore excuse.

25.While stealing from a blood bank, the thief was caught red handed.
risky_1986
2006-05-08 05:01:22 UTC
What does a storm-cloud wear under it's coat . . . . Thunderwear!”



Gravity, it's always putting everyone down.



I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.



He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.



Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.



Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.



Be true to your teeth, or they will be false to you.



Isn't the Grand Canyon just gorges?



It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.



What do you call cheese that is not yours? Nacho Cheese.



hope u enjoyed these as much as i did...
2006-05-08 05:02:59 UTC
here are a few:



using deoderant is no sweat



i wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. then it hit me.



police were called to the local daycare, where a 3 yr old was resisting a rest.



a guy got his left side cut off, but he's all right now.



thirsty jokers can be seen in the punch line.



the roundest knight in king aurther's table is sir cumference.



a policeman accidentally arrested a judge who had dressed as convict for a costume party. the cop learned never to book a judge by his cover.



pet store: buy one dog, get one flea



in the winter my dog wears his coat, but in the summer he wears his coat and pants.



fish in schools sometimes take debate



when a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.



a bicycle cant stand on its own because its two tired.



writing with a broken pencil is pointless.



i hope these made you laugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! : )
shear14946
2006-05-08 05:18:25 UTC
Someone looks like they should be on the corner of Walk and Don't Walk. Get the pun...hon
?
2006-05-08 04:46:59 UTC
My ex was accidently showing his crack in the Library & one of my friends embarrassed him & I told my other friend that I was tired of being the but of Linda's jokes & I hadnt caught what I said & my other friend goes no pun intended. It for a few seconds just went right over my head !
Freddy
2006-05-08 04:44:00 UTC
Que? No pun intended!
2006-05-08 04:45:39 UTC
Speaking of weapons:

I was attacked by an archer once, it was an 'arrowing experience

but I'll spear you the details

unless you have any questions you want to axe me

one thing i've always flailed to understand, though

is why he was such a sword loser
vanessa_lynette24
2006-05-08 04:42:45 UTC
what's a pun? sorry no pun intended
2006-05-08 04:48:22 UTC
you love puns, I love puns.
2006-05-08 04:45:21 UTC
I saw a kid picking his face in the mall restroom the other day. I told him "A watched boil never pops" . I doubt if he was as ammused as I was.
courtman33
2006-05-08 05:07:18 UTC
did u hear about the fight in the candy store? 2 suckers got licked!



did u hear about the fire in the shoe store? 1000 soles were lost.
Blessed
2006-05-08 04:50:33 UTC
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
gregthedesigner
2006-05-08 04:43:28 UTC
2 peanuts are walking down the street and one of them is assaulted. (a salted).
DaAussie@Australia
2006-05-08 04:44:08 UTC
You want a pun



Ok "PUN"



There you go



All better now !!!
romanceallover
2006-05-08 04:45:23 UTC
Gravity, it's always putting everyone down.
2006-05-08 04:44:03 UTC
How does a hospital OPERATE everyday?
FocalBlur
2006-05-08 04:46:31 UTC
"A bun is the lowest form of wheat" —Anon.
sonu1651
2006-05-08 04:45:47 UTC
everyone complains of his memory but no one complains of his judgment.
2006-05-08 05:11:51 UTC
you want puns??? here, enjoy!!!..



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whew!! there you go!!! you have a lot of puns!!!



now, will you give me the 10 points??? please!!!! pretty, pretty please!!! -_-
LiN
2006-05-08 04:53:08 UTC
No Thanks.













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This content was originally posted on Y! Answers, a Q&A website that shut down in 2021.
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