There was a lonely old lady ...her pastor suggested that she go to the pet store and get her a little bird as a a pet.. he called on her the next day and asked her how she liked the pretty new bird she just got ..she said she liked it fine but wondered why it hadn't spoken .. the pastor said "go and get a little swing for it and it ..will swing and swing and talk your ear off " the next day he stopped by and she said he hadn't spoken even after getting him a swing ...He told her to " get a little mirror and set it in front of the bird and he'd swing and swing and look at himself and ...talk your ear off "...Next day he stops over and she said he swings looks at himself but won't speak ...He said get a set of colored beads and he'll swing and swing and look at himself and peck at the colored beads and he'll talk you're ear off ...The next day the lady is in church and has the cage with her and the bird is hanging upside down from the swing and the pastor said he was so sorry ..."did The bird ever speak?" Yeah right before he died he said .."Don't they have any damn bird food at that f***ing pet store ??"